| May. 10th, 2008 @ 09:56 pm Blah........ |
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Current Mood:  apathetic
-Sigh- Could things become any worse? This past month I became a Vampire....and also I was pregnant again by Vladimir. Supposedly when I became a Vampire the embryos died. Well I beseeched the help of the Devil, thusly, he took the Vampirism away and also brought back the children. I was unconcious when he performed this. I was unaware just as to how he did it. Apparently, Vladimir found out how. He gave me some of his blood....while I was unconcious. This indeed, took the Vampirism away...and brought back the embryos....But this had a price...I'm now what is to be considered the Devil's fledgeling....as well as the children not really being Vladimir's any longer. And what hurts me is, I am also immortal...Nothing supernatural, but immortal. I have to suffer....I'll have to watch my beloved son and wife age and die while I go on? I won't have this. I will either find a way to reverse this immortality or I will end it myself when my beloved Maraihi goes. I won't go on and on and on forever. It's not supposed to be like this. And also what hurts is this: Vladimir no longer hears me telepathically, he no longer feels connected to me...It's like a piece of him was taken from me and I was taken from him. This is unfair. And also Vladimir told me, had he known all it took was blood, he could have done the ritual himself....and things could still be as they are. Lately I feel completely sick inside. Knowing what has changed. I want nothing more to do with the Devil. I will not be some 'fledgeling' to the Devil. These twins I am going to bear will also be immortal....And what it is going to boil down to is I would rather if I had no choice but to retain immortality, I want somehow, for Maraihi and our son Richter to also be immortal. And I love Vladimir and I's son, Ian just as much....Today we learned he is a quarter Gargoyle...He can fly...Both of my sons make me so proud.... |